Chasing Dreams

Hey gang! Welcome back to another day of being in the world of Amblissity! I'm a typical girl who dreams just like any other lady. I dream of love, a house, kids, and even choosing the right path. Be that Cinderella or in my case, The Little Mermaid.

So todays song is, "DJ Got Us Falling in Love," by Usher. This song is going to rock today. Actually Usher just himself will rock this today himself. I have to get out that I was a victim and I came out a survivor! Two people knew the second time I was raped in the same foster home by 3. So these two told each other admitting right in front of my face, so when I came out this time. I wasn't alone. I had proof. My proof backed down like a whimpering dog, because it was his mom. Secrets, tons of secrets in this family. Like the oldest slept with the whole town, not me. Just the house. Not much better. But at least it's the truth and not a lie. I could give some names but there's to many to count 😂 I would take this family on Jerry Springer in a heartbeat. And have my childhood best friend with me. She knew too. I made it super easy for her to know. She got the hints.

There was this song that came on the radio, it was famous for like a month. Or maybe it was a few weeks... Unsure but definitely know it was a few times enough for me to memorize. It's called, "Love in this club". It came on the radio a few times while he was taking me on his "adventures". I always listened to music to try and keep my mind off of what he was really doing. So I memorized ever song while he was doing what he wa doing. I could tell every hit song, year, and almost to date. So if this comes out Again. I have little details. But not as little details on the other 6. The ones Im talking about are the ones from 6- 16 years old. The one Im talking about in this blog is the one that told me he loved me at the age of 13. I believed him. But I learned after 17, I learned that men will lie. I grew up thinking that one of my boobs were bigged than the other because of one of the 3 men sucked on my left side constantly. Its upsetting to a girl who has been ripped away from her family already knowing what people do, because it happened to me by my grandmother as well. Yes I'm putting it into writing because it still hurts NO MATTER how many times I'm going to say it or write it. She went to jail and as well will all of you. Even if and when I get justice for all of this. It'll still hurt, as the memories replay in my mind. My memories will haunt me forever and I hope same goes to all of you. You deserve to live with this guilt for years to come. As I will move forward with my life finally being happy while yours deteriorates under me. He was the one who told me to tell people that I was his kid. That wasn't me. I didn't know what would happen. Actually, yes I do. I told him my 18th birthday, I didn't want to go to the club with him. He went crazy. He called the house several times that night. It was dark out. Every door on the house was locked. Window blinds all closed. He knocked on the kitchen door while a kid my age was downstairs with me. He walked the entire way around the house, trying to get in. Make rumors about me. I'm right here to back 'em up with my best childhood friend.

Love in this club played 6-8 times everytime we stopped. I'm serious when I say this guys, if its happening to you tell somebody. This isn't fun to go through. I know your pain. I picked family over saving myself and over honesty. I wanted to escape, you followed them, and not us. It wasn't fair! It still isn't. I left to free myself. Unlike you, I wasn't getting it easy. Unless it happened to you too. I got raped every time I was living somewhere new except with our real mom, dad, and pap. You abandoned all of us the day you lied, and ruined all of our lives. Whateved your fate; you deserve it. Not us! You didnt hear them out, so why would you hear me out? Oh wait till I become famous. You come knocking on my door. You can take that hand and turn around and take it back to someone who cares. I left myself get used and abused, difference was that I cared. You didnt.

Anyways guys. This is all I can write for today. So again, go check out the songs by Usher, an awesome singer for my day.

And until next time, Here's to hoping!

-DJ_Amblissity